The Spiritual Bypass

Back in 2004 I was in a lot of personal pain and wanted to find the quickest way through it. Who could blame me? It felt miserable waking up every day and facing my life. I wanted a different one.

My interest in spirituality increased considerably at around this time. How could I find peace with myself? In May of 2004 I had a fascinating run in with relics from the original Buddha. I spent one whole day on Cloud Nine because of a blessing I received from a Buddhist Nun. More on that here.

I felt so positive that day. Everything was an opportunity. I honestly loved everyone. I saw brilliant streams of golden light emanating from people as they walked down the street. I wanted to live the rest of my life like this.

The next day I woke up and everything was the opposite. I was depressed. I loathed myself and everyone else. It all felt so heavy. Of course, I wanted to get back to how I felt the previous day and stay there. Who wouldn’t?

Months later I found out about something called an Enlightenment Intensive; a three-day meditation retreat designed to give people a direct experience of truth. A friend of mine returned from one completely turned on by the experience so I figured, “why not?”

I became addicted to Enlightenment Intensives. Through them I found a way to get that delicious taste of eternity once again. I was a spiritual junkie. I’d get high on the weekends and crash during the week. Of course, I thought of myself as enlightened because I was having genuine experiences of enlightenment. However, I had no life balance. I was suffering more, not less.

Rushing to spiritual heights in the way I did doesn’t create a strong foundation of wellbeing. It creates what I call a rubber band effect; a series of destabilizing highs and lows that left me confused as to what I was doing wrong.

As it turns out, what I needed to do was resolve a lot of issues on the level of my ego. My identity as a spiritual being was actually getting stronger, but my thoughts about who I was on a personal level had very little coherence. I needed to resolve that egoic part of my identity so I could have a strong spiritual foundation.

At the most basic level, I was in resistance to myself and also resisting my life. I was trying to push it away by rising above it spiritually. That doesn’t work. Spirituality includes a loving embrace of oneself and one’s present circumstances, no matter how hard it is to accept. The place to start is always our current reality.

For this reason, I often recommend that people start out with the Embody Your Strengths Program before the Embrace Your Spirit Program if they’re new to personal growth work. The Embody Your Strengths program can help create a stable foundation on which to build a profound spiritual life.